Category: Neurodiversity
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Why Men Don’t Go to Therapy
Introduction Most men who sit down in my room didn’t decide to come. Someone made it a condition. A wife who said she couldn’t carry on like this. A GP who asked one question too many. A boss who noticed. Occasionally a brother who said the thing nobody else would say. The man arrives, sits…
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When One of You Is Autistic: Making a Relationship Work Across Two Wiring Diagrams
Introduction She says he doesn’t listen. He says he listens to every word, and can repeat them back, which somehow makes it worse. He says she never tells him what she wants. She says she tells him constantly, and that she shouldn’t have to spell out that a sigh at the sink at nine o’clock…
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Meltdown or Tantrum? How to Tell, and Why It Matters
Introduction Aisle four, Checkers, ten past five. Your seven-year-old is on the floor. Not crying so much as roaring, arms going, shoes off, and a woman by the yoghurts is giving you the look. Someone’s mother once told you that a child like this needs a firm hand. Your own mother has views too. And…
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School Refusal: When Your Child Can’t Face the Gate
Introduction It usually starts with a tummy ache. Sunday night, just after supper. Then again on Monday morning, worse this time, with tears. You keep them home, because what else do you do with a child who says they feel sick? By ten o’clock they’re fine. Bright, even. By Sunday night it’s back. The GP…
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Why Teenagers Don’t Ask for Help
Introduction Almost every parent I’ve sat with after a crisis has said some version of the same sentence. “I had no idea.” They’re not careless parents. They’re attentive, loving people who ate supper with their child every night of the thing they didn’t know was happening. That’s the difficult truth about teenagers and mental health:…
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My Teenager Won’t Talk to Me: What’s Normal, and What Helps
Introduction “Fine.” That’s the whole report on a day that lasted eight hours. How was school? Fine. What did you do? Nothing. Who were you with? People. Then the bedroom door closes, the headphones go on, and the child who used to tell you every detail of every break time on the drive home might…
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Autism and Exam Preparation: Helping Your Child Through the Season
Introduction For most autistic children, the exam paper is not the hard part. The fortnight around it is. Autism and exam preparation can be a tough combination. Timetables change. The hall smells different. Someone they have never met invigilates. A chair scrapes for three hours. The routine that made the year survivable is suspended for…
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Exam Week: Why It Asks So Much, and Why It Asks More of Some Brains
Introduction The timetable goes up on the fridge and the whole house changes shape. Maths Paper 1 on the Monday. History on the Tuesday. Afrikaans on the Wednesday, Life Sciences on the Friday, and something on the Saturday morning that nobody has looked at yet. Four days. Four completely different demands. And a teenager at…
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Helping Your Teen Through Exam Stress: A Parent’s Guide
Introduction The house usually tells you before your teenager does. Doors stay shut a little longer. Someone snaps about a plate left in the sink. The child who used to talk right through supper now answers in one syllable, then disappears to a desk where, as far as you can see, very little happens. Exam…
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AuDHD: Am I, or Are My Children, Both ADHD and Autistic?
Introduction You have probably been told, more than once, that you are a contradiction. You need routine, and you are the one who wrecks it. You are desperate for something new, and a change of plan can ruin your whole day. You will talk for two hours about the thing you love, then leave a…
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Neurodiversity Therapy in Cape Town: Signs Your Child May Be Neurodiverse
Introduction Parents almost never arrive at this question all at once. It builds. It starts with a comment from a teacher. Then a birthday party that went badly for reasons nobody can quite explain. Then a supermarket meltdown that seemed enormously out of proportion, and a nagging sense that other people’s children do not appear…
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Identity Therapy and Mental Health Support in Cape Town: A Guide for Teens, Parents and Adults
Introduction When counselling somebody in identity therapy, there is a particular sentence I hear a great deal, usually about ten minutes into a first session, usually said apologetically. “I do not really know who I am anymore.” It comes from sixteen-year-olds and it comes from fifty-year-olds. It comes from people who have just left a…
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ADHD Therapy in Cape Town: A Complete Guide for Adults, Teens and Parents
Introduction If you have landed on this page, there is a good chance you are somewhere in the middle of a long question. Perhaps your child’s school has raised the same concern for the third term running. Perhaps your teenager is bright, articulate, and quietly falling apart. Perhaps you are forty-two, successful on paper, and…
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When You and Your Child Both Have ADHD: Navigating Neurodivergence as a Family
When You and Your Child Both Have ADHD – Introduction It often starts with your child. A teacher raises a concern. An assessment reveals ADHD. You sit in the feedback session, listening to the psychologist describe the symptoms, and something unexpected happens. You stop hearing your child’s story and start hearing your own. The difficulty…
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ADHD and Relationships: When Love Isn’t Enough Without Understanding
ADHD in Relationships You love each other. That has never been the question. The question is why the same arguments keep happening, why the small things keep becoming big things, and why one of you always feels like the adult in the room while the other feels like they can never get it right. If…
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ADHD: What to Look Out For
Introduction Something has never quite added up. You have always worked harder than everyone else to achieve the same result. You lose track of conversations mid-sentence. Your mind races at night while your body begs for sleep. You start projects with genuine enthusiasm and abandon them without understanding why. You have been called forgetful, scattered,…
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The Exhaustion of ADHD Masking: Navigating Burnout
Introduction You arrive at work on time. You hit your deadlines. You smile through meetings and say the right things at the right moments. To anyone watching, you look like you have it all together. But underneath, you are exhausted. Not the kind of tired a good night’s sleep can fix. This is a bone-deep…
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Late ADHD Diagnosis in Women: Why So Many Women Are Only Finding Out Now
For as long as you can remember, you have felt like you were working twice as hard as everyone else just to keep up. You have lists for your lists. You have spent years battling what you thought was anxiety, or depression, or simply not being disciplined enough. You have been called scattered, oversensitive, or…
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The Anatomy of Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) in Adult ADHD
Introduction Have you ever received a piece of feedback, a passing comment, or even a look from someone, and felt your entire world collapse? Not in a dramatic, attention-seeking way. In a private, gut-wrenching way that leaves you questioning your worth, replaying the moment on loop, and withdrawing from the people around you. If you…
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ADHD in Relationships – How It Feels to Live With It
Introduction For individuals living with ADHD, relationships can feel like a rollercoaster. There are moments of deep connection and joy, but also times of frustration and misunderstanding. ADHD doesn’t just affect concentration, it influences emotions, memory, and the way time itself is experienced. Partners often see the outward behaviours, but inside, the person with ADHD…
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ADHD as a Superpower: Why Neurodiversity Is a Strength, Not a Limitation
Introduction What if the traits we label as “problems” in ADHD are actually signs of a brain built for a different kind of brilliance? What if new science is showing signs of ADHD as a superpower? For decades, ADHD has been framed almost entirely through a lens of deficit: difficulty focusing, impulsive behaviour, restlessness, disorganisation.…
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The Importance of Self-Compassion in Mental Health
Introduction We are often our own harshest critics. When something goes wrong, the inner voice that speaks up first is rarely kind. It tells us we should have known better, that we are not enough, that we deserve the pain. For many people, this self‐critical pattern runs so deep it feels like the truth rather…
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Therapy for Teens with ADHD
ADHD (Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder) shows up in different ways for every teen. Some may struggle to concentrate in class, while others feel constantly restless or act impulsively. Teens with ADHD experience a combination of challenges, including: Over time, these challenges can affect how teens see themselves. They may begin to internalise feelings of failure or believe…
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Understanding the Emotional Needs of Neurodiverse Teens
Neurodiverse teens often experience the world – and their emotions – more intensely than their peers. Feelings can come on quickly, last longer, and feel harder to name or contain. Anxiety, overwhelm, frustration, and isolation are common experiences, especially when teens feel misunderstood or “out of step” with those around them. As parents, it can…
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Twice-Exceptional and Totally Unique: How Therapy for Neurodiversity Can Help
Khanya is what we call a twice-exceptional (2ce) person – gifted in some areas, yet facing learning challenges in others. Brilliant with numbers but living with dyslexia, she moves through the world with both exceptional insight and unexpected obstacles. She can solve problems that leave others puzzled, and yet stumble on tasks most people find…
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Helping Kids With ADHD Do Life: A Parent’s Guide
Helping kids with ADHD do life. As a counsellor, and as someone who has walked this journey in my own extended family, I know how overwhelming it can feel to raise a child or teenager with ADHD. Sometimes they can delight you with their spark, creativity, and energy. But on other days, you feel annoyed…
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Mental Health Support for Teens – Building Resilience in a Changing World
Remember being a teenager? It was tough, right? And to think, we often reminisce over how times felt simpler then. That’s not just nostalgia talking. Teens today are facing a more complex world than ever before. That makes helping your teen a bigger challenge than ever before, and makes mental health support for teens more…